“Bonjour, International Energy Agency. Comment puis-je vous aider?” “Hello. May I speak with someone in English please?” “Ah, oui. I mean yes, you can. I can help you. Well, I don’t know if I can help you. I mean I can speak with you.” “Quit blathering. I’m British. I need a roadmap. And I need it quickly.” “You do not need to be rude. What sort of a roadmap, Monsieur? We are not a tourist agency, you know. Is it possible you are perhaps a little bit, how do you say, swimming in the [Read more]
Column: The next energy boom will have similarities to past ones but will look a little different
Despite the fact that energy is essentially pipes and wires and petroleum and heating ducts, the whole scene has become ridiculously emotional. Never in history has the word ‘pipeline’ brought rooms of people to purple-faced shouting matches. It’s worse than sports arguments, for crying out loud. Therefore, it is sometimes helpful to observe with objectivity, to step back and dispassionately analyze as Sherlock Holmes would. Don’t get emotionally invested. As a good example, consider this [Read more]
Column: Stuff you can’t make up: US pipeline posturing so irrational it can’t be real
Today, let’s put on philosopher hats. I have no idea what they look like, presumably some sort of antisocial adornment that makes sense to those that examine the nature of truth, existence, knowledge, and ethics. Given that background, perhaps on some days, they wear a colander, on others a wooden box, or maybe something made out of twigs and leaves. If you think I’ve taken leave of my senses, I’ll grant you that - you could be right. But I'm not alone. More frighteningly, so have [Read more]
Column: A view inside California’s systemic energy insanity – power outages over hydrocarbons or even nuclear
Ever get hooked on a YouTube spiral, where you start off watching one thing purposefully and by choice, then get hooked by the sequence of algorithmic suggestions, the ones that cleverly blend your interests with whatever Google wants to shove down your throat? And then you realize that the sun has set and three hours have passed? The same thing happens to me when wandering in the weird world of energy. The business used to be somewhat straightforward and tethered to reality, but now it's [Read more]
Column: “Hey! You can’t just run away like that. Can you?”
Last year, perhaps because of covid-isolation, or possibly the related drinking-margaritas-for-breakfast, I had a crazy dream about an Alberta Energy Regulator employee catching Shell trying to leave the province. For whatever reason, the dreams are returning. In this latest episode, the AER was on the same patrol across the grasslands, and made a similar catch. An AER employee spotted a guy crawling under a fence as though escaping. The whole thing looks suspicious, and since the portly guy [Read more]
Column: The return of golf’s spring classic parallels a return to normality – for energy too
It felt like a weird pleasure to succumb to a spring tradition once again. The Masters golf tournament was on this past weekend. I had trouble pulling myself away. For the non-golf crowd, that might be an eye roller, but hang on, wait until you hear about all the drama. To be clear, I am a fair-weather fan, only the Masters and the British Open catch my attention - the Masters because it is such a welcome sign of spring (last year’s Masters-in-fall was an abomination - no thanks), and the [Read more]
Column: Even madmen and communists understand the real ‘energy transition’, Canada’s leadership couldn’t run a hot dog stand
While social media is devolving into a showcase of the worst human behaviour, that doesn’t mean it is uninteresting. In the old days, it required some gumption for an enterprising and not-shy lunatic to get on a soapbox and yell at the world from a street corner. Now there is no barrier to entry and total anonymity. Unfiltered and unmuzzled citizens can present a truly nauseating window into what humans are (in)capable of, thought-wise. Now and then, though, this collective consciousness [Read more]
Column: One stuck ship disrupts 12% of global trade – messing with the web of energy and distribution systems is not a joke
Anyone who commutes by car, particularly when going with the flow in a busy direction, is well aware of the chaos that results from some singular dumb little event. Someone rear-ends someone else on a freeway, and the result is two crumpled bumpers and two miles of backed-up traffic. Long weekends on the Trans-Canada highway can turn into multi-hour campouts as the RCMP scratches its head, wondering how on earth two cars could end up like that. Sometimes relatively little events like this [Read more]
Column: There are far more important things to worry about than Hollywood’s vacuous-villained ‘Bigfoot’
Some say the end is near Some say we'll see Armageddon soon I certainly hope we will I sure could use a vacation from this Bullsh*t three-ring Circus sideshow of Freaks Here in this hopeless $&%^% hole we call L.A. The only way to fix it is to flush it all away Any $&%^% time, any $&%^% day Learn to swim, I'll see you down in Arizona bay - “Ænema” by Tool (L.A. resident misfits) Sigh. So now ‘we’re’ going after a kid's movie. I understand the motivation and the [Read more]
Column: Warren Buffett and the pace of the ‘energy transition’ – should be done by his 200th birthday
In Omaha, Nebraska is a 90-year-old who runs a business alongside his 97-year-old business partner. While you might think encountering them driving on the freeway would be bad, I assure you that competing with them in the business world would be much worse. Those dentures will eat you alive. I’m referring of course to the youngster, Warren Buffett, and his slightly more experienced sidekick Charlie Munger. The pair run Berkshire Hathaway, a holding conglomerate so large that it frightens [Read more]
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